Comic 858 - Help Caius

Posted on 29th Mar 2018, 1:33 PM in Shipping Off to Southden
Help Caius

<<First Latest>>
Average Rating: 5 (3 votes) / Rate this comic

Author Notes:

Morgenstern 29th Mar 2018, 1:33 PM edit delete
You sync with Caius and Dr. Finch.

You give Caius a strong painkiller effect--enough that the pain won't debilitate him, but not so much that he can't tell if he's injured.

You increase his production and flow of red blood cells. More specifically, using Dr. Finch's knowledge, you increase how efficient his red blood cells are at carrying oxygen--people who live extensively at higher elevations have blood cells with a sort of "tighter grip" on oxygen, so you imitate that.

You convert small amounts of useless materials in Caius's body to more bone density at his knuckles.

You start focusing on converting any lactic acid Caius builds up to... well, anything else.

Caius grins, retaking a fighter's stance. "Y'know why I'm gonna beat you, Painiac?"

Caius starts to use hit and run tactics--moving in at odd angles, baiting an attack before slamming huge hits into Painiac's knees and hips, then maneuvering back out. The upped adrenaline and painkillers free Caius to swing harder than he normally would... and his engineered physiology lets him swing harder than a human body should allow itself to. He throws punches hard enough to tear his own muscles, but you work quickly on repairing them.

"I'd try to break it down for ya," Caius says, "but I ain't got tha crayons."

Again, he dashes in, fires a series of blows, then moves back out. Painiac swings, throwing punches out and down, but his attacks are too predictable. Caius varies his approaches, almost moving in from behind the giant, where he can't reach effectively before Caius gets his hits in.

The crowd boos, but it just drives Caius harder. "Was makin' you ugly a tactical choice, or just a side effect?"

More rushes. More rapid, powerful blows to the legs. Painiac starts to get irritated, both with the insults and with the damage his lower body is taking. The colossal soldier is no genius, but even he can tell he can't take much more of this. The crowd's boos become deafening, the anti-police insults getting louder and more vulgar.

Caius isn't even short of breath.

"A lot o' dumb mistakes gettin' made here tonight," Caius says, trying to be loud enough that the audience and Painiac can hear him. "Tha crowd still thinks I'm a cop... and you still think ya got a shot at beatin' me."

Caius rushes forward, but he's not as subtle this time. He wants Painiac to know it's coming. The giant doesn't go for a punch, but a grab--and he steps into it, overextending in his desperation. Caius sidesteps, using both arms to grab one of his foe's massive limbs. The arm is large enough that on a normal throw Painiac could just brace off the ground, so Caius twists it, almost applying a lock as he turns into the goliath's momentum... and rolls him to the ground, hard. Painiac is tossed into his back with a reverberating thud.

It winds Caius just a little. He stops to see if Painiac is actually going to get back up--and he does, or starts to. Like a turtle tipped onto its shell, Painiac does some struggling just to climb to his feet... and Caius capitalizes, rushing into the opponent's blind spot as he stumbles. Caius scales the big man, latching onto his back, throwing a sleeper hold around his neck.


Painiac's neck is short, his head sinking almost directly into his body. It makes it hard to lock the sleeper on... but between that, and Painiac's thick fingers, it's impossible for him to pry Caius's arm off from around his throat.

Painiac gets to his feet, stumbling around the ring. Caius keeps the hold on tight. Painiac tries to reach backward, tries to grab Caius off his back, but his huge arms can't bend enough. He's built for turning over cars and slamming through walls, not for prying a smaller man off of his own back.

Painiac starts trying to rush backward, to crush Caius between the arena pillars and his own body. You mentally let Caius know when, and he kicks his feet back, bracing himself so his spine doesn't take the impact. Again, and again, Painiac tries to slam Caius into the architecture, and repeatedly Caius shoves his feet out, stopping Painiac from getting a full slam going.



Painiac slumps to the ring floor

first on one knee, then on his hands...

and then he falls forward, unconscious.

The crowd explodes, a mix of impressed cheers and furious boos. Caius climbs off of Painiac, struggling to stand--he took a great deal of weight on his legs. You check on him: he's not injured, just very, very sore, even with the painkillers. Caius raises his arms in victory as the bell rings.

"Your winner," the announcer declares as she makes her way back into the cage, "...Caius!"


You and Dr. Finch have done your best up to this point to look worried, and at this point, you do your best to look relieved. Well, you do, you think Dr. Finch's continued concern might've been more genuine.

Caius, panting, smiling wearily, makes his way back toward you.

Lovers smiles, as well, though only a little. "Head on upstairs, if you lot don't mind too terribly. I'll meet you back in the bar once I've acquired our money."


Guest 29th Mar 2018, 2:21 PM edit delete reply
You go Caius!
BunnyMuffin 29th Mar 2018, 2:23 PM edit delete reply
give him a hug (not too hard of course) and congratulate him!!
Leafia_Barrett 29th Mar 2018, 2:26 PM edit delete reply
"Monstrous size has no intrinsic merit, unless inordinate exsanguination be considered a virtue." -Darkest Dungeon narrator
Congratulate Caius, and hug him if he's not injured in a way that would make a hug painful. Give him a once-over for injuries to patch up while we wait for Lovers upstairs. If you can't hug him before patching him up, do so afterwards. We should make sure to locate Ace as soon as possible - either Dr. Finch can look for him while we wait for Lovers, or we can all look for him as soon as we're done talking.

Depending on how late it is, we should be ready to head back to the bunker to talk to Ms. Voclain - I still say we leave a syringe for her in case she decides to use it. It's not going to make us any more vulnerable to do so, since there's already a sample of blood right there if Thale really wants it: the bloody bandages.
Nayru9572 29th Mar 2018, 2:37 PM edit delete reply
Manually, I hope. It'd help make us look more convincing. Maybe the barman has a first aid kit lying around?
pkrankow 29th Mar 2018, 2:30 PM edit delete reply
Good show!

Information, paperwork, and protection so we are not on multiple fronts out here are probably worth more than cash.
chaosblitz 29th Mar 2018, 2:31 PM edit delete reply
Wait did Caius just Princess Bride the guy?
chaosblitz 29th Mar 2018, 2:35 PM edit delete reply
Also, we better be careful, since this is usually the point where they try to rip you off (in most TV shows, at least). (yes I know I'm being paranoid, Lovers seems decent so far. I'm not saying we need to take off or anything, but we probably shouldn't let our guard down. They might try to get us in their debt somehow)
lil Joshu 29th Mar 2018, 2:41 PM edit delete reply
lil Joshu
Money's not a bad thing to have.

That said, that's not why we're here, and we have a fair chunk.

If we think they're ripping us off, we call them on it, we don't want them to think we're patsies, but we follow up that (at least unless it's a ridiculous amount) with that we'd be more than willing to convert the money that they want to keep into additional services.
lil Joshu 29th Mar 2018, 2:56 PM edit delete reply
lil Joshu
And since my suggestions for the fight got posted too late (as I was in middle of posting and next comic went up), here's my rendition of us channelling power contained in the Red into Caius...

Blue_Elite 29th Mar 2018, 3:56 PM edit delete reply
Great fight MM. The narrative was terrific!

Let's hold off on discussing the fight until we're out of Southden/in the bunker. I really don't want either a Deck member or someone working for a Deck member to find out we kinda-sorta cheated.
Also let's try to return Caius to homeostasis. Get those hard bits out of his knuckles (it's great for punching but terrible if you want better dexterity than a 2-year-old) and such like that.

I'd be fine to hang around and network with Lovers a little but we definitely don't want to overstay our welcome (if we really have any here). We'll want to get in contact with Ace of Cups in case it'll be a day-long process to get those documents.
Otherwise uh... is Caius in any condition to drive? I doubt Dr. Finch knows how to drive a motorcycle. Do we? Do we need to do a sync with Michelle to get back?
psychoshen 29th Mar 2018, 4:51 PM edit delete reply
I'm pretty sure Dr. Finch would steadfastly refuse to drive the motorcycle, even if he knew how.
psychoshen 29th Mar 2018, 5:03 PM edit delete reply
Definitely time to make those knuckles normal shape and size, but leave them as dense as possible without affecting Caius' day to day functioning. People who punch things a lot create tiny microscopic fractures that backfill with more bone, so this wouldn't look out of the ordinary, if the Deck decides to look into it.

Jane and Finch should make a minor scene about helping Caius up the stairs, in fact he may really need the help. Jane should discreetly let the gang back home know how things are going.

If possible, Jane should hang back, near the top of the stairs or halfway up, see if she can hear anything the Deck will be saying about the group. Might provide a heads up as to what the Deck is planning, if anything. If she syncs with Finch, maybe she can even improve her hearing by modifying her ear slightly, keeping it hidden behind her hair if need be, until it can be reversed.