Comic 501 - Loot the medical room

Posted on 11th Oct 2017, 3:24 AM in Doors
Loot the medical room

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Average Rating: 5 (3 votes) / Rate this comic

Author Notes:

Morgenstern 11th Oct 2017, 3:24 AM edit delete
You check the cabinets of the medical room. You find some really expired stimulants and medicine for motion sickness, and that's about it. Like most of the bunker, this place came pre-looted.

You investigate the large machine.

You are... actually not sure what this thing is.


You take a closer look.

You discover that this is the biggest, goofiest looking bio printer you have ever seen in your life. The screen for operating it is very small, and you have to crouch to access it. The thing has lights and buttons and bulbs and cords coming out of everywhere for no real reason you can discern. It's currently out of bio paste, but bio paste is pretty cheap to buy. Otherwise, you... think this thing might still work. You cannot guarantee the quality of its product, given how old and sloppily thrown together it is.

Truly, science has come a long way.


rufiangel 11th Oct 2017, 3:39 AM edit delete reply



I-I can't even

senpai, glorious senpai

♥♥♥ I feel like my birthday has come early ♥♥♥

(EDIT: I'm still super duper happy about this, I just keeping thinking 'omg my dreams have come true' and then I just grin like an idiot :D :D :D hehehehe)

thank you senpai)
Kitty 11th Oct 2017, 9:38 AM edit delete reply
And it even has *old-fashioned blinkenlights* on it! Blinkenlights!

Time to get Finch and Fuse to gerfingerpoken all over it >:3
rufiangel 11th Oct 2017, 11:26 AM edit delete reply
XD I love that it has all this goofy stuff, if it makes melodic beeps when it prints things I will be even more ecstatic LOL
Akasha 11th Oct 2017, 3:42 AM edit delete reply
Well, there's the bio printer you've been waiting for, rufi. Sure, it's not in MS-DOS, but it's a big, clunky... well, either first-generation or just flat-out prototype bio printer. Either way, we're definitely gonna need to test it out to see if it's still suitable for actual use, first. Just need to buy some bio paste, is all.
rufiangel 11th Oct 2017, 3:59 AM edit delete reply
It's the most goofy, gorgeous and beautiful thing and it will totally print in the slowest pace with the loudest noises and Fuse is going give us his patented 'wat' face when we tell him we're going to use this to try and give him new skin grafts and Dr. Finch is going to find it a joke even by the crappy hospital standards he was always ranting about

but it is going to work and it is going to be fantastic and my life is now complete <333

(As an additional side-note, I should explain that I just wanted an old-school bio-printer from yesteryear, which is this exactly XD I was calling it an MS-DOS bio printer in short-form lolol. It's even more perfect than I thought it would be with its goofiness and I'm just... so happy you can't imagine XDDD)
Archon 11th Oct 2017, 3:47 AM edit delete reply
Niiiice. Going to want to experiment with this later.
That said, have Finch and Fuse check it out before we mess around with it.
Checking if it needs spare parts and/or could be refined a bit would be a good start.
11th Oct 2017, 3:49 AM edit delete reply
Probably a good thing it's out, nobody wants to clean up 100+ year old decayed bio paste.
Wondering Lost 11th Oct 2017, 3:50 AM edit delete reply
Oh and let's not forget about,cute little mother's Red. We may have to consider this room option#2. Since I'm not sure about that portal pit.
rufiangel 11th Oct 2017, 6:54 AM edit delete reply
Ya, this place is not a bad idea, provided it's actually on our planet -v-)/
Macheman7 11th Oct 2017, 9:25 AM edit delete reply
Notable thoughts: Red + Bio Printer = <3, or accidental horrible monsters?
Although it could be cool to have someone around here say 'yo red michelle got herself banged up again, we need an extra arm' and Red helps somehow.
...Not sure how the Red could help with it, actually. Shrug.
Kitty 11th Oct 2017, 9:36 AM edit delete reply
Hmm, that's a good question. Would Mom's red be able to make redflesh that's compatible with Jane's body? Hypothetically, Jane could be repaired by dumping redstoff into the machine, but it might have to be her *own* redstoff.
Nayru9572 11th Oct 2017, 4:45 AM edit delete reply
Glad to see you got what you wanted, Rufi!

If there's nothing left to check out in this room, let's look at the other unlocked one while we wait for Fuse and Finch to finish. I definitely don't want to go out the airlock before we're sure we've checked everything in here out.

EDIT: Oh yeah,and maybe inform the others of what we've found.
rufiangel 11th Oct 2017, 6:53 AM edit delete reply
Like like like

It's just one of those things where like I was sort of maybe hoping for a thing

And then the exact thing happened and it's totally legit

And now I'm just yayyyy XD thank you for sharing in my joy lolol <3

But yes, I am all for letting others know about this (Dr. Finch can take a look at the bio printer if he's done checking the air and things, uh, provided he didn't find super radiation here lol gosh I will be mighty sad if he did) and we can check out that other unchecked room while Fuse continues his hackery, ya. :D
Varil1024 11th Oct 2017, 8:17 AM edit delete reply
This is by far the most useful bunker so far. I vote we just live here now. Transfer useful stuff from the other bunker(s) here(primarily additional beds), clean up, stuff like that.

Though, uh...random thought. Since these doors decouple if someone swipes the main bunker, it'd be REALLY easy to trap us in Future-Russia/Space/Another Dimension, or whatever if our enemies ever learn of this place. We really need to figure out where we are, even if it means having somebody setting the main door to another bunker and opening the doors here.

...wait, can we tell when the door is hooked up or not from inside the bunker? Seems like that'd be something they'd want. UNLESS the dimensional travel was a secret and some of the folks here were "regular" soldiers or whatever and arrived via mundane means instead of door shenanigans.

Like have normal dudes maintain the generator and oxygen production, and have multiple other generators for secret stuff? Like a freezer staffed by prototype robots, full of frozen "tubemeat" taken to eleven, or bioweapons, or something, and a dimensional loop? And, possibly, other things?

I dunno like I said this is all random thoughts. I just wonder at what this place's day-to-day operation looked like when it was in full swing. What parts were secret to all but the highest ranking staff, what was known by even the grunts? Was this place for experiments or did it have a deeper purpose? We should keep looking for new bunker cards.

Also, we need to see if we can change the door codes. We don't want people with Z50 files and door codes wandering in and locking us on the moon on purpose or otherwise.
Anonymous 11th Oct 2017, 8:36 AM edit delete reply
A bio printer? I have a sudden urge to remake the flesh monster in the hospital for some reason... if only to release it to Patton Thale and claim a rival company did it to spite them because they ran said rival business out of money.
Archon 11th Oct 2017, 8:54 AM edit delete reply
Maybe later. Gonna have to work our way up from little monsters before we can throw out a big beasty.
Macheman7 11th Oct 2017, 9:30 AM edit delete reply
Nnn... No. This is the way of the enemy. Have we become so hateful of the enemy that we have become them?
lil Joshu 11th Oct 2017, 10:23 AM edit delete reply
lil Joshu
I'd rather print kittens.
tor 11th Oct 2017, 9:20 AM edit delete reply
Maybe we can use the bioprinter to make a copy of our blood and experiment to what it can or can't do?
Mochi 11th Oct 2017, 11:42 AM edit delete reply
there’s an entire zone fifty report on why that is a bad idea. it’s called the lasker report.
Memo 11th Oct 2017, 11:47 AM edit delete reply
I agree, let's definitely not do that!
Archon 11th Oct 2017, 11:53 AM edit delete reply
No copies.
If we want to experiment with using our blood and the bioprinter, only use fresh blood.
Memo 11th Oct 2017, 9:25 AM edit delete reply
Bio printer - Yay :)
Also, we should check out the last door (the one next to the cabinets)
Macheman7 11th Oct 2017, 9:28 AM edit delete reply
Okay so. This place is hellacious and all, buuut... Unless the Jury prototypes are just maids or something, we should be sure they won't blow us up with LAZORZ or something when they see us. Really, we need to sort that out before we get too headlong about setting up shop in possibly deep space.
Memo 11th Oct 2017, 11:51 AM edit delete reply
Well, the jury look-a-likes are in bunker B, so I don't think we are in much danger of that. There could be nasty things behind the airlock, but only one way to find out :)
PurpleKetchup 11th Oct 2017, 12:59 PM edit delete reply
Print mini-Janes, inject them with Red, lead your army of invincible cuteness to victory.

Dr. Finch can totally help with the first step. Probably.
Kitty 11th Oct 2017, 4:41 PM edit delete reply
We have enough flowers to give each of 'em a flower for her hair, too!
lil Joshu 11th Oct 2017, 2:01 PM edit delete reply
lil Joshu



we should be able to print a hamburger.
Baeronius 11th Oct 2017, 5:28 PM edit delete reply
Oh gawd.
Dudecallmecool 11th Oct 2017, 5:15 PM edit delete reply
this comment will probably not be seen, but I wanted to say this early since I probably can't later when the time comes. (This sounds like it's leading up to something bad but it's not.) My birthday is in 4 days and I was wondering if on that day they could try to use the oven we found earlier and try to bake cookies, because that would be awesome. Kthxbai (-ω- )